Some time ago I wrote an article suggesting us females turn off our brains. I thought it was pretty clear what I meant. Later, I realized that many women read it literally without looking into context and without actually reading the article.

To clarify it a little bit, I want to start off by telling you that I have a very strong mind. I am extremely independent. I have had years in my life where I wouldn’t take “no “ for an answer. If I wanted something I went and got it. I had been my own boss for years. I was a typical girl ( like many of you here) who thought they knew everything better than anyone else. I was a firm believer in the old saying “if you want it done right, do it yourself”. It should give you a small picture of me and that once I had the same values than you.

My analytical brain, however, started to notice in my 20es that my boyfriend at that time had made pretty good decisions, gave great solutions, and actually solved several problems like a genius even though I didn’t see him to be as such.

That was one of the first situations where I started to wonder what the difference was between him and I, between the thought process of a man vs women.

I had started paying attention to those differences not even in my life, but also in my friends’ lives, other people…. and I came to a conclusion that the manner in which he thinks is in fact, genius. Now, in my family and when my strong ego comes out yelling for things to be done “this way”, my husband says different and I happily surrender and everything comes out perfect. When, however, my ego rules, we end up with more a complex situation.

Let me explain why this is. Our minds are built differently. Women are in touch with feelings and emotions and are largely affected by them. When we are making decisions, we are thinking about every person involved in the choice as well as their emotions. Eventually, we end up with what seems like multiple voices in our head and multiple personalities in our heart. Men, on the other hand, think to simply solve the problem. Their brains are not affected by the doubts and uncertainties females experience. They don’t attach to the financial side of situations when making a decision like women. They analyze it logically and put it in perspective. To counter, females can work on those qualities and train themselves, but it will be an uphill battle considering it is not her natural inclination. That is why we need to learn “turn off “ our natural female brain in some situations and look to our man to guide us.

They will not only do it more efficiently but also keep us calm which is hugely important for us to keep balance.

Some of you are telling me that a man’s decisions are wired and don’t make sense, here’s what I have to say about that. A man is not a woman. He MUST have a different approach to things. Only duality works in this life. To elaborate, when you ask for a man’s help, he instantly detects that there you are unhappy. For instance, let’s say you come home one day and say, “honey, what do you think I should do with that job? Susan keeps offending me and I feel stressed and John also doesn’t like the way I do things and etc….”. You tell the whole story with all details.

Your man looks at you and hears the story and in his brain, it sounds like that: she is unhappy. “What do I do about it? I want her to be happy! I don’t want her to be stressed. I don’t want her to come home stripped naked from emotions- emotionally dead, I don’t want her coming home in a bad mood. How can I fix this”.

As a result, your man tells you “my love, quit”.

This is where all problems begin. We could just say okay and quiet but our ego takes over and we go ”wait, I have worked there for 10 years and you tell me to quit? Do you even care?! I put in so much effort in my position and now you tell me to flush it all down the toilet?! “… and we go on and on, yelling and screaming and sometimes eventually leading to a fight… As a solution, us females should be able to turn our brain off and let our man lead the ship in these moments. Trust me, he does it better. It is not a matter of competition, it is a matter of comfort and happiness.

We need to understand, men give advice not because they’re cold and don’t care or aren’t listening, but because they do care very much. Whatever is happening with their woman attacks their life, therefore, the automatic response is too protective. The main theme in his decision making for you is based on protection! Isn’t that what we, women want? So now I ask you all, why can’t we accept it properly, when our men are ready to give it to us. When are they ready to protect us? We punch them in their faces with the iron fist of feminism, telling them “I can do it myself” and name calling because they didn’t give us what we expected from them… Your man sees your situation better than you do. Therefore, he will be more efficient in solving it.

He doesn’t want to use you, he doesn’t want to show you that he knows better, he doesn’t want to be superior or bossy… he just wants to protect…

I constantly hear from women that men have forgotten their roles and duty. I also constantly hear from women that they want to feel protected and feel safe. Yet, the only source that has been out there for centuries and very organic is a male figure is being rejected, stepped over, dismissed, diminished, stripped down his masculinity and every opportunity to be a man has been taken away…..

I do want to ask all of you, please, try it. Try to trust your man. Try to let him be a man! Try it for a week and then tell me how it was.

BUT, be prepared that he might be puzzled for a bit especially if you fall into the category of the “I know it all” or “will do myself” kind of girl… Be genuine during your trail, please and let him be your man!

You will see what kind of a difference it will make in your relationship if you try it for a week or two…….. I wish you all, my dear women, good luck!