I’ve been listening to a lot of authors (some of them Pulitzer winners), public speakers, and other public figures on different issues.

I had realized some time ago that the reason for such a big battle here about my articles is that I am touching very painful areas. Funny thing is that we all are in some sort of pain, but because we were taught to not show it we do not accept to talk about it. This is poisonous for individuals. My responsibility as an author, of sorts, is to mention that and draw your attention to those hidden areas of your psyche. I know how painful it is to hear to accept that we are not perfect. Most people prefer to see how not perfect their neighbor is but not themselves.

I’m sorry if I’m hurting your feelings but my goal is to help everyone here to start a new path or continue a healthier one you are on…not to hurt.

I have also been accused of not having data, survey, and analytics. But do you know what the most brilliant authors are doing when they need to write a book? They research everything in an obsessive way and know everything about their topic but they almost never mention it in the book. When I asked one of the Pulitzer winners why that is, he told me that if one has too much data it gets too concise and less livable. Funny he said that, because when I’m asked I always say my articles and thoughts are based on my experience.

In this article, I would like to speak about what harm can be done by a woman who is working. Many of you have been shaking their fists at my face, but only a few truly think about what it means.

To start off,  it is a harm to a man because you are taking away from him an opportunity to meet ordinary challenges, deal with them, and grow. He feels less needed and masculine when you present yourself as an independent superwoman. It all weakens his masculinity, believe or not.

Next thing is, it is harmful for a woman because we tend to lose some femininity when we choose work. It is a part that wasn’t intended for us by our gender role to start with. Therefore, by choosing this we are losing charm and men’s lust and hunger in a good way. When we work, we tend to become bold, aggressive, independent that forces us to shred off our feminine charm. I can hear you telling me that not all types of work boost those qualities,such as secretarial or nursing occupations. You need to understand one thing: when we earn money we get encouraged to be independent and that is our worst enemy!

I wrote in one of my articles that being a wife, mother, and good house maker requires a lot of work and is a challenge on its own. So a woman has a hard time dividing her time and interests between two worlds no matter what they say to us. Achieving success in both is almost impossible.

Even if she decides to make a career, a woman will never meet men’s excellence in his world and always will be “lower class”. So she bounces between two worlds, one of which is hers and she rejected. The other one which is someone else’s and she tries to concur. We should not doubt why women feel insecure and inadequate sometime in their workplaces. It is because they enter a world that doesn’t belong to them. If her husband proposes for her to find a job, it creates so many questions in her mind and eventually she doubts if he can take responsibility and solve problems. Another danger if her boss who, in many cases a man, is smarter than her man. That is becoming a problem because she starts to look up to him, takes orders, and works on his chores. She begins to disregard and sometimes kill the respect to her husband.

A working woman is also harmful to children.

When mom works because she has to, generally children understand that and have no moral problems with it and in many cases, they even respect it. They don’t feel a lack of love when something like that happens. When she works by choice, in their head pops a question and concern that she prefers to work to them. Once again, I want to make a point here- it is all natural formations that are creating in us without us knowing it sometimes. So children doubt her love and in many cases, those children rejected the most in their lives. Imagine, when she is at work, her job is a priority and sometimes it can be demanding…. so kids are less demanding? That is their feelings. I’ve heard a lot of mom saying when I come home I’m spending all my time with kids and I make up for my absence. But in many cases, it is not true. A woman is too tired when she comes home to pay adequate attention to them. When Nintendo was released here in the states, Americans could not play that game because it was too smart Japanese game. There was a magazine issued its content was for months and months on explicit and detailed description and tips all sorts on how to play in that game…. good for thoughts about our society… so maybe it’s time for us to start thinking for ourselves? Shall we start with us- women?

And she also has tons of things at home she needs to handle that are usually priority over kids. Too much attention from a non-working mom can also harm a child, don’t get me wrong. However, it is a slightly different topic and we are not here to talk about it. Moms present at home during the day provide a child with security and helps them develop normally even if she is doing something else. Even if a child comes home and doesn’t pay attention to their mom, her being at home is already very beneficial for a child. There is a clinical study that proves that if a mother misses long hours, an infant can become retarded in growth and development. Think about it…

When a woman is working, it is a danger to society as well. If you remember, the pattern of working women started formulating during world word 2 when women had to go to factories and such. Around that period America and not only developed social problems like divorce, drug abuse, violence on the streets, all kind of rebellions and moral problems. Many of those problems can be addressed to a household where a woman was working mom. A lot of adolescent problems come from the impact of the home. Working women destroyed our economy and women today feel they must work. Pay got lowered because of women and now we have lower pay to fit a two income family where the mother feels like she has no choice but work.

Sad, isn’t it?! But it is not a doomed situation. Women first should learn how to

Leave on the income of their husband and be thrifty. It may require moving to a smaller place or cutting expenses on groceries and changing stores because you may not be able to afford Fancy Grocery Store that fancy people go to. Maybe sell a car or cut in vacation and find ways how to lower expenses across the board and learn how to be happy with fewer clothes and less expensive. After that please quit your work:).

Hopefully, by the time you will make all those adjustments you will learn how to provide your husband with support, healthy household and help him to build his confidence. Trust me, when you are home, it’ll bring peacefulness in the household right away. You will be rested, able to do what you want and so on… and your man will be doing his part more eagerly. A woman who stays at home meets a big challenge of making a secure home for her husband and children in our insecure works. Feminism fails to understand that someone needs to do women’s work. Who will be a mother or a wife and is it correct that all excellent brain capacity of her is wasted at home field?

I doubt. I think the best career for a woman is a home career because it requires the best out of us, the greatest powers of mind and heart. To be a successful mother and wife is greater than be a successful businesswoman, doctor or opera singer. We fail to forget how wide women’s influence is. Every woman can make an excellent contribution to the society through her children but not every man can make any type of contribution through his work. Being home is a different kind of glory and great wives almost not known because their rewards are quit: the success of her husband, happiness of her children and her overall success in the home. Maybe it is time for us to change our priority and start looking into something that we have been disregarded for decades…